How to Start Over After Hitting Bottom

WARNING! This post is long!

There's an old adage that goes, Once you've hit bottom, there's no place to go but up. Personally, I think it's possible to stay down there, if one so chooses to. Most people though, prefer to climb out of their perceived mess and pain, myself included. Question is, as posted in the title, how do you start over again once life has knocked you down as far as you think you can go?

Have you ever known anyone who hasn't hit bottom at least once in their lives? Of course, 'bottom' is relative. A person dealing with serious substance addiction and someone who has lost their investments may have differing ideas of where the lowest point in life is. It doesn't matter, really. What counts is what you do when it happens.

Where is Bottom and Why is it so Hard?

Your bottoming out point is wherever you deem it to be. I've found that it is usually level with that place where your greatest fear lives.

Dealing with drastic events is typically hard and painful, causing much stress and a feeling of having your life and soul stolen away. The control you formerly felt and fought for is gone. You'd have a hard time convincing me that anyone enjoys it.

You didn't get to where you are overnight, though you may not know it. If we don't listen to the whispers of our inner guidance, we usually continue down a rough path until our Source has no option but to drop a piano on our head, so to speak, to get our attention. Ouch.

Again, it's how you bounce back that's important and I believe that you can. Life may look different when you come out the other side but if you're laying at the bottom of life's well, you're getting a vital wake-up call. You really should pay attention.

Benefits to Hitting Bottom

That awful thing you hoped would never, ever happen to you just laid you out flat, metaphorically or literally. You feared and dreaded it happening for so long that it has now manifested in your physical existence.

Yes, I know, you didn't consciously bring this on but we know that we alone are responsible for what comes our way. Sometimes, it's no fun. But believe it or not, there are a few benefits to it happening. Consider the following:

• Now that you've hit bottom, you can let go of the fear of hitting bottom because you're there
• You get to start over fresh, you have a second chance
• The Universe will connect you to the right resources, some you may not have had otherwise
• The new path you take can lead you to different, happier results
• This big, bad thing that's happened brings your attention to something you need to change
• You discover what is truly important in your life and what you're not willing to do or put up with anymore

There are probably more benefits that could be added to that list but these are the ones that come to mind at the moment. The basic point here is that these hard times can actually help you, even though nothing could feel further from that while you're going through the bad stuff.

Starting at the bottom of the ladder and climbing back up

Starting the Climb Back Up

Okay, you know that you are in a very uncomfortable place. Benefits, schmenefits, you want to get to the good stuff, the how to make the pain go away and feel that life is good and controllable again stuff. Believe me, I understand. Been there, done that.

In my case, I went from being totally mobile to completely paralyzed in the blink of an eye. I'm lucky in that it was not permanent, although I'm still recovering a year later. Unfortunately, or fortunately depending on your viewpoint, that illness started a domino effect that collapsed every other area of my life, too - mental, emotional, financial. But you know what? I had a level playing field, a blank slate.

I've been given the opportunity to recreate my life in a way that I much prefer to the old one. If you're at rock bottom, you have the same opportunity.

"It's really important that you feel good." - Dr. Joe Vitale

 Start Where You are Now

I know you probably don't want to hear it but you need to stop whatever you're doing right now and accept things as they are. You are in that unpleasant place, find a way to come to peace with it. I can tell you from experience that it is a very liberating thing to do. It can take a while to get to that point, it took me months. Once I finally let go though, things started working more in my favour. I was also a lot less stressed.

Fear, denial, impatience, procrastination....they're all just forms of resistance. The culmination of resistance is that brick wall you've run into. Sit, think and feel. If you're like me, you can see how you got yourself into this mess, into this NOW. No, that doesn't make it feel better and guard against claiming any guilt for it, that doesn't help you. Take things for what they are - a contrast to how you want your life to be.

Maybe start with something like, "Okay, this is where I am now, this is how it is." Try to be as objective as possible, simply look at the situation itself, not how it is effecting you, just for a moment. If you were advising a friend about your next step, or where you go from here, what would you say? Who would you ask for help? What new opportunities do you need to create to live the way you really want to? You get the idea. Face it. Own it.

Regarding your emotional state, you don't (and shouldn't) ignore it. Whether you're sad, frustrated or afraid, it's okay. Go ahead and honour those feelings by acknowledging them. Then let them go.

Let It Go

Looking towards and focusing forward is crucial. You can't create a new future if you cling to the past and if you decide on doing the same things you did before hitting bottom, guess what? You'll follow the same road downhill. You can't do the same things and expect different results. Don't worry though, if you are committed to a new, better beginning, the Universe will move heaven and earth to help you. Count on it.

I'm not saying that surrendering is easy, it isn't always. But it's necessary for a smoother climb upwards. Some Law of Attraction experts offer differing views about letting go. Abraham, of Abraham-Hicks recommends not looking at what's happened at all (usually), rather focus on what's ahead. *Louise Hay, on the other hand, suggests that healing the unconscious causes is important. What works for one person may not work for another. This is an area that you'll have to face and decide for and about yourself. (* see video at the bottom of this post)

Suggestions:

1. If you need to talk to someone or require other help in sorting things out, I urge you to take advantage of available resources. Please trust your gut and inner guidance when choosing a helpful counselor or adviser. Don't go at this in a desperate way. Consult with yourself and trust the answer. Find the right fit for you and what you're going through.

2. If you are able to meditate, this is a great way to relax, let go of the stress and start accepting where you are now. People who find it difficult to meditate can find other ways of relaxing and refocusing. Use whatever works for you - running, drumming, journaling, whatever. It will help your body and mind calm. From that more peaceful place, you will find it easier to face your dilemma and start surrendering.

A Few Thoughts for You to Consider

This post has gotten quite long but if you're still reading, I'd like to give you a couple of things to think about.

First of all, you don't have a time frame or deadline. Go at a pace that works for you for the best chance of success. Who cares if it takes 3 hours or 3 months? The important thing here is that you now have a wonderful opportunity to revamp your life. Read that again, let it settle within you and allow yourself to feel optimistic.

Every ending is a beginning. That's exciting, don't you think? I do. Go nuts in imagining what you're going to do now. The world is your oyster. Fill your thoughts with your most heart-felt wishes. Don't limit yourself, go all out and imagine everything you want to do, be and have. This is your chance to start over and do things differently.

I am making Mondays in January all about building a foundation for the rest of the year. Next week, the topic is about practicing the new thinking that you're working on now. Until that time, please listen to the whispers of your inner being. It loves you very much.

Below is Louise Hay's full-length movie, You Can Heal Your Life. It's an hour and a half long, so get comfy and prepare to really be inspired. I watched the DVD of this several times over the months that I was in the hospital. It really kept me going.